What Women Are Really Thinking About Your Underwear

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At some point men, you’re gonna get lucky (again), and you’re going to need to strip down. Sure, you may be hitting the gym, and yes you may be pealing off some fine designer threads, but what about your skivvies? Are they too short, too tight, or too white? Got the wrong one’s on and it could be the last time you get laid (with her, potentially, ever). So let’s ask some women what they want to see when they see you disrobe …
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Boxers

“Do men still wear boxers? Why would you wear underwear that lets your package flop around and gives you wedgies?” ~ Kathy P.
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Briefs

“Only if your body is sufficiently toned that you would look good brooding and oiled up on the side of a bus. Or if you’re under the age of nine.” ~ Stefanie H.
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Boxer Briefs

“Boxer briefs are a good look on almost everyone.” ~ Joanna W.
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White Underwear

“I know, I know. You keep baby wipes in the bathroom. You have one of those six thousand dollar Japanese toilets with a heated seat and cleansing water plumes. You use a bidet. Even if it’s only a 1/1000 chance, why would you ever risk skid marks?” ~ Sandra D.
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Fruity Patterned Underwear

“Stripes and polka dots are great. Flora and fauna are acceptable. Santas and Simpsons are not okay.” ~ Mira P.
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Long Johns

“Stop. It’s not that cold.” ~ Stephanie C.
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Package Holders / Enhancers

“These make dicks look like Muppet Noses.” ~ Sasha N.
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Thongs

“Are those mine?” ~ Nneka G.
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Mesh Underwear

“I don’t care if they’re breathable. We’re going on a date never!” ~ Christine J.
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Commando

“If I can see your dick before I see your dick, the mystery is gone – like your underwear” ~ Jackie T.
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